Deaf server has the perfect response when customer rejects her service to avoid ‘uncomfortable’ lip-reading

“Me being deaf isn't the problem. There is nothing wrong with being deaf; it's society that is the problem,” this quote from British actress Rose Ayling-Ellis, who has been deaf since birth, summed up the prevalent ableism around us. Deaf people face this even after science has demonstrated how their senses of vision and touch are sharper. Lo (@llosoncy) from O'ahu, Hawaii is one of 430 million people across the globe who struggle with hearing disabilities, as well as humiliation, but she refuses to suffer in silence.

On her TikTok channel, Lo regularly posts videos of a series about “deaf servers,” in which she speaks about deafness-related stereotypes and her encounters with people as a deaf server herself. In one of these popular videos, which over 320,000 people have viewed, she recounted an encounter with a customer who rejected her service just because she was deaf. “This is an interaction I had with people while I was working,” she said in the video, mimicking the interaction between two parties with dialogues. Lo described how she introduced herself and informed the customer that since she was deaf, and hence relied on lip-reading. “If I can’t see your mouth, I can’t hear you,” she told the customers before asking them if she could get them anything from the menu.

Lo opened her notepad and took out her pen when the customer said that they were ready to place an order. But the customer kept looking down at the menu while saying, “Well, I definitely want a Margarita, and my friends over here want water.” Unable to read their lips, Lo interrupted the customer and said, “I am sorry, would you mind looking up at me while you talk? I can’t lip-read or understand you if you’re looking down.”

The customer apologized and said, “Of course,” but started repeating their order while looking down at the menu once again. Undeterred, Lo offered them a pen and paper so they could write down their order, only to be shocked when the customer wrote, “Can we get a different server, please? I am uncomfortable with being lip-read. It’s weird.”

Lo nonchalantly transferred their table to another server and later noted in the video’s caption, “I don’t get people like this often but for the record: being deaf doesn’t stop me from doing my job and getting paid.” In the comments section, people praised her for maintaining her composure in a situation that was probably offensive and hurtful to her.

“The way you can keep your composure. I respect that because I would’ve fought someone,” commented @ufw.aniela8. @idkenatasha said, “I don’t get why people make such simple things so hard for service workers.” Some people pacified her by saying that they’d love to have her as their server, while several tried to explain that the customers might not have done this out of disrespect. 

You can follow Lo on TikTok to gain awareness of more deafness-related stereotypes in her videos.