Mixed couples are more common nowadays than ever before. But acceptance still doesn’t come easily, especially from the older members of the family. In a YouTube video, this woman shared the progression of her Chinese grandma coming to terms with her boyfriend and finally accepting him. The brief clip is truly swoon-worthy. Claire and Peter are a mixed couple who upload travel vlogs. Recently, they posted a video where the woman introduces her boyfriend to her Chinese Grandma who isn’t exactly pleased with her choice of a boyfriend. But that gradually changes. The couple then uploaded that cute video on their channel and the amount of acceptance the grandmother shows is inspirational.
Image Source: YouTube | Claire and Peter
Through the video, one can see that the grandmother is super disappointed for an entire week. By the third week, she gets quite friendly and accepting towards her boyfriend. Eventually, when they are leaving the grandmother keeps coming along and waving at her boyfriend and that is a different level of wholesome. For a mixed couple, getting accepted by each other’s family means a lot as adjusting to a different culture and way of life can already be overwhelming. Disapproving families can greatly add to that burden. At such times, patience and initiative work wonders, the couple bears testimony to it. In another video, the woman is asking her grandfather if he approves of her boyfriend. The grandpa has a totally different take on things from the grandma. Claire asks her grandpa if he likes her boyfriend, and he says that he likes him very much and that he is very good.
Image Source: YouTube | Claire and Peter
She asks him if he would have liked him more if he was Chinese. Grandpa says, “The same.” He added, “I wouldn’t like him if he smoked.” He explains that he doesn’t like smokers. He happily says that her boyfriend likes eating Chinese food and listens to her and that was a very good thing. She also asks him if he has any trouble with her boyfriend being on YouTube. To which the grandpa replies that it was okay. He hilariously adds that if he listens to you everything is okay. He wisely adds that if she meets someone who doesn’t listen then the couple would have fights more often. He also says that as she has found someone who does as she says it will be good and that she has made a very smart choice.
A YouTube user @LadeliciaDelinda commented on her grandma’s video, “Your grandma has the sweetest smiles. You can tell she had plenty of love from the beginning but maybe was just holding it in! I wish my grandma was alive to have met my Salvadorian boyfriend. I also wished my tio was alive too. I’m Chinese but have family from Mexico so my Chinese mom was surprisingly very receptive to my boyfriend. Love seeing interracial couples on YouTube connect cross-culturally with family.” Another user @micheledimond commented, “Aw, sweet Grandma! Just making sure he’s genuine. I had my daughter’s BF go on a light hike on Puget Sound just to see what I thought of him, and interact with him alone. They just had their first anniversary. He got a ‘thumbs up’ from our interactions and I have seen how he cares for my girl… I think he might be a keeper.” It was quite endearing to see both grandparents have a different but equally heartwarming reaction to the couple’s relationship.
Tackling a new business venture as a budding entrepreneur requires persistence and perseverance. Most entrepreneurs and start-ups fail, so it makes sense to think encouragement from friends, family, and peers would help morale. However, research suggests that what may be even more helpful is a baseless critic telling them they’ll fail.
A team at North Carolina State University gathered research from three studies involving a combined 1,400 participants. They found evidence that the majority of those who defined themselves as entrepreneurs were more driven when told they would fail. In fact, the less credible the critic, the more persistence the entrepreneur displayed to prove them wrong.
The researchers explained this “underdog effect” as part of Psychological Reactance Theory. The theory suggests that when a person’s freedom is challenged, they tend to push back harder and stronger than before. In this case, when someone tells an entrepreneur they’ll fail, the response tends to be, “Watch me!”
Entrepreneurs offer their thoughts
Entrepreneurs and business leaders spoke to GOOD to weigh in on this discovery. Many related to the entrepreneurs who felt more motivated after being disregarded by critics. However, they also urged caution against basing decisions and motivation solely on proving others wrong.
“This resonates with me to a degree. I think someone should be able to intuit when their persistence has become too much,” said Nathan Silvernail, co-founder and CEO of Plantd. “Often, folks are unwilling to pivot when a pivot is required. They’re afraid of change or hesitant to course-correct even when all of their signals are telling them to. Stubbornness paired with ignorance is a dangerous combination in any regard. A truly successful person will understand what this means.”
“Being told you might fail can absolutely strengthen someone’s resolve. But entrepreneurship isn’t just about endurance,” said Samyr Laine, co-founder and managing partner at Freedom Trail Capital. “If you ignore every piece of criticism because you’re trying to prove people wrong, you damage relationships and miss useful signals. Business is relational. Investors, customers, employees, they’re all giving you feedback in some form…You need resilience, but you also need self-awareness.”
“Proving others wrong might push you to short-term wins, but it’s consistency over time that drives championship-level results,” said Christina Reckard, president of the Pat Summitt Leadership Group. “The entrepreneurs that make it the distance can’t wait for a critic to give them the fire inside they need to motivate them, they need to have a great product or service, with the customer at the center, and the self-discipline to pursue excellence regardless of the obstacles.”
“For those of us who don’t have unlimited personal resources, entrepreneurship takes against-the-odds tenacity…If you’re deterred by a dismissive word, you’re not an entrepreneur for very long,” said Matt Graber, co-owner of Cool Hand Movers. “When acute adversity hits, or is even implied, the urge to swim upstream naturally kicks into high gear. Is this a healthy dynamic? Probably not. The results aren’t surprising but I wouldn’t go searching for negative reinforcement in place of traditional coaching and productivity tools.”
Psychology experts weigh in
Psychiatrists and therapists who spoke to GOOD explained why entrepreneurs can get a boost from such negativity. However, they also warned that persistence can turn into stubbornness, causing entrepreneurs to miss opportunities to learn and improve.
“When a person feels as though their competence is being challenged, they may become more motivated to prove themselves,” said Krista Walker, a therapist and clinical director at The Ohana. “This may be especially true for entrepreneurs, in particular. That is because their identity may be tied to their business or performance. It can feel like a personal challenge.”
“When we cling too tightly to an idea, an approach, or a specific outcome, we lose flexibility,” said psychiatrist Dr. MaryEllen Eller. “It can become easy to confuse commitment with rigidity and stubbornness for strength.”
Balance is key
“Being told ‘you’ll fail’ or ‘you can’t’ can actually make us want it more. It fuels a drive to self discover autonomy and prove your abilities,” said psychiatrist Dr. Sam Zand. “However when this fuel is from resentment, it can become unhealthy if it takes over who you truly are. Some of the biggest entrepreneurs use stories and experiences of doubt as fuel, but stay open to constructive criticism and learning.”
Based on the thoughts of these professionals, it seems best to pay attention to any data that conflicts with your vision in case changes need to be made.
Maintaining a deep sense of connection and trust in a long term relationship is often easier said than done. Even for couples who have been together for years, the daily grind can sometimes dull the spark of romance. However, Dr. Cortney Warren, a psychologist trained at Harvard Medical School, has identified a specific set of verbal habits that distinguish highly successful, trusting couples from those who struggle.
Dr. Warren recently shared seven phrases that secure partners use every day to reinforce their commitment. These small shifts in language are designed to foster vulnerability, safety, and a sense of shared purpose.
The first few phrases focus on the core of any partnership: the belief that your partner is on your side.
Feeling that twinge of jealousy or insecurity in your relationship? It happens to all of us, but how you respond can make all the difference. Instead of immediately reacting, try this: pause and ask yourself: What does my reaction to this situation say about me? Is it about fear of being unloved? A belief that you’re “not enough”? Often, our strongest emotional reactions are more about our own insecurities than about our partner’s actions. Taking the time to reflect on your triggers, where they come from, and how you can strengthen your self-esteem can help you communicate with your partner in a healthier, more productive way. This clip is from my recent conversation with Shanenn Bryant on the Top Self Podcast. #SelfAwareness#EmotionalIntelligence#HealthyRelationships#JealousyTriggers#TopSelfPodcast#RelationshipAdvice
Simple, to the point, and clear. This communicates that you know your partner and that you believe they have your best interest in heart, even if you get into an argument. It also allows them to feel safe making some decisions on both of your behalf.
2. “You see me as I am.”
This not only tells your partner that they know all there is to know about you without fear of hiding parts of yourself, but that you’re comfortable being vulnerable should a difficult subject come up. It communicates that you trust your partner will respond with compassion, not judgment, while implying that they can trust you to do the same in return.
A couple on a romantic date. Credit: Canva
3. “We’ll get through this.”
Arguments, fights, and conflicts happen in even the most solid relationships. However, saying this phrase reinforces that while things still need to be sorted out, there is no intention of breaking the relationship over the disagreement. It allows more open communication and reiterates that it is you and your partner against the problem, not each other.
4. “Go have fun with your friends/Thanks for giving me space!”
If your relationship is solid, time apart shouldn’t be a threat. Alone time is natural and, frankly, healthy. Respecting your partner’s independence in turn respects yours.
Dr. Cortney Warren, relationship advice, Harvard psychologist, building trust, healthy communication, romance tips, non-verbal cues, marriage success, intimacy, partnership. Credit: Youtube
5. “I miss you.”
As a counterbalance to the previous phrase, “I miss you” isn’t an indicator of being too clingy unless you’re not offering your partner the trust to have space. It’s just a nice way of saying that you look forward to being together and builds upon that when you reunite, whether it’s after a long business trip or later in the evening after work.
A growing relationship means mutually planning and investing in each other’s futures to further turn “your plans” and “my plans” into “our plans.” This phrase relays to your partner that you want them around for the long haul.
7. “Can we talk?”
Communication issues are one of the primary reasons relationships fail. Asking this simple and direct question accompanied with the previous phrases as foundations in your relationship will allow trust for you to ask and be asked when something troubling occurs with either of you.
While verbal communication is important in sustaining relationships, it’s good to incorporate non-verbal gestures of support, love, and trust, too.
Now, pairing these loving wordless gestures that experts, counselors, and psychologists recommend with the previous seven phrases could help your relationship develop deeper connection and trust.
1. Eye contact
Seeing eye-to-eye literally helps you both see eye-to-eye better when discussing a difficult topic or when you want to express loving attention to your partner.
2. Smile
Smiling is a nonverbal cue to reiterate that your partner’s presence is welcomed and safe. It also reminds your partner that you’re both okay, too.
3. Supportive touch
Caressing a shoulder, a peck on the forehead, holding hands, or a tight hug—any of these and all of these are ways to provide comfort and reassurance along with your words. It could also be a way to indicate your interest in further intimacy.
4. Mirroring
Matching your partner’s posture and pose helps foster connection while also indicating you’re absorbing what they’re verbally communicating to you. So, when you adjust your posture to meet theirs when they’re discussing something important to them, they’ll know you think it’s important, too. On the other end, if you match their relaxed pose, they’ll in turn feel more relaxed, too.
5. Enjoy quiet time together
Being able to enjoy the silence in the same room bolsters feelings of safety and comfort. It shows that you and your partner don’t feel panicked or stressed about the other feeling bored, awkward, and you don’t cary the pressure of needing to be entertained/entertaining. Shared silence is precious in a relationship.
6. Handwritten notes
Okay, this might be a cheat technically, but written notes and letters can be left for your partner to find when they wake up after you have left for work early, on the kitchen table, or on a bathroom mirror as ways to express those previous seven phrases. For some people, written communication is much easier for them than speaking, too, so there’s that factor to consider.
This is a bit of a grab bag as what acts of service are depends on who you are in the relationship with. It could be making them coffee each morning the way they like it so they don’t have to. It could be doing a chore they hate doing. It could be cooking them their favorite food after finding out that they had a long day. These acts remind your partner that they’re known and safe with you.
While there are general guidelines, a healthy diet can still look different from person to person. Some people eat meat, stick to a vegetarian diet, or go fully vegan for a variety of reasons. With that in mind, a recent study suggests something that may seem surprising at first. The study indicates that eating meat could increase your chances of reaching 100 years old.
Starting in 1998, research from the Chinese Longitudinal Healthy Longevity Survey followed the diets of more than 5,200 adults aged 80 and above who were free of cardiovascular disease, diabetes, and cancer. The group included omnivores, pesco-vegetarians, ovo-lacto vegetarians, and strict vegans. In 2018, twenty years after the research began, results showed that among the 1,459 centenarians, a higher percentage were omnivores compared to the other groups.
? Study Finds Meat Eaters Are More Likely To Live To 100.
What if everything you thought you knew about healthy eating was about to be turned upside down?
A new study has revealed a surprising link: older adults who eat meat and other animal foods are more likely to live to… pic.twitter.com/tfcAorzkw1
One might think this would debunk the idea that plant-based or vegan diets are healthy, but that’s not necessarily the case. Vegetarian and vegan diets have been shown to reduce the risk of cardiovascular disease, diabetes, hypertension, dementia, and cancer, among other ailments. However, the results of the research could be due to our bodies’ needs in later years.
As our bodies age, it becomes harder to maintain muscle mass and bone density. On top of that, our appetites tend to decline. Animal-based foods like meat are natural sources of protein and calcium that can help prevent declines in muscle strength and bone density, as well as malnutrition in adults who eat less. So while a plant-based diet might be more beneficial to younger people, a more omnivorous diet could be better for great-grandpa.
“Older adults may face distinct nutritional challenges,” said researcher Kaiyue Wang of Fudan University in Shanghai. “Our study suggests that dietary recommendations for the oldest-old should emphasise balance and nutritional adequacy, rather than strict avoidance of animal foods, especially for underweight older adults.”
However, this doesn’t mean that you should call grandma to make sure she’s eating bacon cheeseburgers. The National Institute on Aging recommends that older adults eat seafood, low-fat dairy products, beans, lentils, peas, and fortified soy products to get their protein fix. It cannot be stressed enough that while eating meat, per this study, appears to be beneficial to older people, that doesn’t mean they should switch to an all-meat diet.
As with diets in general at any age, lean, unprocessed meat is preferred, with an emphasis on fish and poultry, as well as how they are prepared. Frying meat tends to add excessive fat, while certain sauces paired with meat dishes can add fat, sugar, sodium, and unnecessary calories.
As mentioned previously, a healthy diet looks different from person to person depending on their age, needs, and health challenges. It’s best to consult with your personal physician to establish the best diet for you, or if you want to make any changes to your current one. They can also refer you to a licensed dietitian who can help, whether you prefer turkey, tofurkey, both, or neither.
